Currently, the great debate across America is the question of whether marriage should be re-defined to include same-sex marriages or whether it should remain set apart, a unique lifelong relationship between a man and a woman, establishing a family.  Without doubt this is a critical issue of public policy that must be decided — and it must be decided correctly.  But the issue of marriage goes much deeper than mere policy; it goes to the very heart of each and every American.

Before addressing the heart of the matter, it must be acknowledged that on the policy level, marriage must be properly defined in both the state and federal constitutions because both governmental jurisdictions have their own court systems, each with at least a few judicial activists bent on legislating rather than interpreting.  Kentucky has four levels of courts — District, Circuit, Court of Appeals, and Kentucky Supreme Court — and any one of them could begin the process of overturning Kentucky’s Defense of Marriage Act, passed in 1998, that protects marriage from adulteration.

The federal court system has three levels — Federal Court, Court of Appeals, and U.S. Supreme Court — again, any one of which could begin the process of overturning current traditional marriage statutes or practices.  And the federal court system seems to be inclined to do such meddling.  But anyway you look at it, state or federal, each system is bound by their respective constitutions when an issue is spelled out there clearly in black and white.  It is a taken-for-granted issue, one that has always been true but not codified into law because it has always been true, that seems to incite activist judges to mischief — grievous mischief.

So yes, it is important to pass the state and federal constitutional amendments to protect marriage from any kind of re-definition by anyone — gays and lesbians, bigamists, polygamists, polyamorists.  But then let’s be about the substantive business of re-elevating marriage to its proper place of uniqueness among relationships.  This is not a matter of law, but of the heart, indigenous to the very core of our beings and the mores of our society.

Marriage is the foundation of family.  Family is the foundation of society.  Therefore marriage is the foundation of the foundation.  The work that is done in the home at the hands of the mother and father, is the future of America. . . and of any society.  To have that task defined, re-defined or leveraged for personal gain, civil rights or sexual orientations and preferences is to trivialize what marriage is.  It’s like trying to re-define gravity by statute because someone wants to fly without wings.  The sad reality is that many in our society have missed the essence of what marriage is about and actually believe it can be re-defined or shifted.  That brings us back to the problem.

America, look in the mirror.  Since the Sexual Revolution. . .

·         The overall number of married adults declined by almost 9 percent (while the overall population continues to grow).

·         The marriage rate is at an all-time low, while the divorce rate has doubled.

·         The number of cohabiting couples has dramatically increased seven-fold to nearly 5.5 million.

·         One-third of all children are born out of wedlock.

·         Nearly 40 percent of children do not live with their biological father and over 50 percent of America’s prison inmates came from fatherless homes.

·         Nearly 4 out of 10 children will experience the divorce of their parents before they reach adulthood.

·         The proportion of children living with never-married mothers increased from 7 percent to 36 percent.

The answer?  We must as a society get back to the basics of marriage.  Let us re-elevate the institution of marriage.  Examine its original purposes.  Challenge individuals to be accountable to their pledges. Question all of the “feel good” answers found in the Sexual Revolution.  Honestly assess the impact on children that the sexual experiment of the last 35 years has had. 

When we have done these things — and done them honestly — I believe that we’ll come home.  And when we do that, hope will replace the familial anarchy, and legal anarchy, in which we are currently mired.