The back-to-school machine is cranked and running again and kids who are barely past the paper doll and little league stage are now off to conquer the subjects of English, history, and sex – yes, sex. For years now the role of educating children about anatomy and sexual relations has been a staple of the public education system, and the starting age for this discussion gets younger each year. Though the motive is altruistic – someone has to teach these young ones about development and human behavior – many of the methods leave a lot to be desired – or, rather, leave kids desiring a lot and, thanks to some sex ed programs, having the know-how to back it up.

In the name of health and well being kids are given warnings about smoking, binge drinking, drugs, and over-eating. The prevailing message is, "Don’t do it." But when it comes to sex everyone seems to get a bit skittish about delivering absolutes, regardless of the medical facts. Can you imagine if teachers were to say, "Not smoking is the best way to avoid health problems but some of you are going to smoke anyway, so just make sure you use a filtered cigarette?"

It sounds ridiculous, and yet what are teens today being told regarding sex? "I can’t tell you what is best for you. You have to decide for yourself. Sure, abstinence is the best way to avoid pregnancy and STDs, BUT, if you decide to have sex here are some instructions on how to protect yourself." If this sounds like a mixed message, you’re probably hearing it right.

Never mind the fact that these methods of "protection" have not been proven to protect from a vast number of the STDs that are at epidemic proportions now. According to a Center for Disease Control study done in 2000, condoms have only proven effective in reducing the transmission of HIV and gonorrhea in men. That’s only one and a half STDs out of over 20 – and that is the good news. Other forms of contraception are intended to prevent pregnancy only.

Nothing is protecting those involved from the infections that can be life-long, painful, embarrassing, cancer causing, and a major cause of infertility. Who’s telling little Suzy that if she is given birth control pills as a teen she may not get pregnant…ever? And what about protecting her heart, her emotions and her self-esteem? Not a method out there can prevent the hurt or regret that often follows early sexual encounters.

In an attempt to "reduce" the number of teens having intercourse, some of the curricula available have even taken to suggesting other activities that teens can participate in without "going all the way." Needless to say, these activities are not along the lines of a rousing game of tennis or a lengthy conversation on current events. Many would be surprised to find that in the six "Programs that Work" recommended by the CDC, students are encouraged or even assigned to compare condom prices and types at the local drug store, make a list of common condiments (yes, foods) that can double as lubricants or come up with inventive ways to make condom use more appealing (such as scheduling an entire day to try out different condoms and ways of using them with your partner). Some of these programs, though perhaps not in their entirety, have been used in Kentucky.

On a good note, many schools in Kentucky have also been exposed to the abstinence message in recent years. Some have gone so far as to implement abstinence curricula as the sex education taught in the school. Others have invited abstinence educators from local Pregnancy Care Centers or other organizations to make presentations.

In order to make sure our teens are getting accurate and desirable information we cannot place the burden on the schools alone. Concerned adults, especially parents, need to be informed about what kids are being taught in schools. Go to the informational or PTA meetings, ask to see the curriculum, talk to the teachers and, most importantly… talk to your children. Don’t let mixed messages lead to mixed-up kids. And, especially when it comes to sex, don’t let the teens of Kentucky settle for second best.